What Makes Him Sexy?

"Hallelujah! It's raining men!" By now we've heard that Adam Levine has been declared the Sexiest Man Alive by People Magazine. I'm not denying the guy's appeal at all. He's got the look. But to say that Adam is the hottest of the hot is going a little far. Are you really telling me that he's sexier than Idris Elba or Superman himself Henry Cavill?! I'm not buying it. People Mag, you obviously didn't tally my vote. Anyway, this got me to thinking... What really makes a man sexy? Is it his biceps? His clothes? His perfect hair? Well it can be all or none of the above.

When you think sexy, of course the first thing you notice is physical appearance. Those eyes. That smile. Oooo girl, look at that body! Phew. Ok, wipe the drool from your mouth. Science tells us that we are attracted to a man due to the need to procreate. We want someone who looks strong and can go out hunting and bring home the bacon. Women are drawn to a protector and a provider. While this may be true, we don't want a guy with all brawn and no brains. If we did, then I'd hope the world would only be populated by super buff male models. Those days of "me Tarzan, you Jane" just aren't cutting it anymore. Give me a guy with intellect and drive. Ever wonder why those New York fast-talking business guys get girls. They're motivated... by money and power, but still motivated. But then the problem with those boys is they are all ego. Yes Don Draper is charming, sucessful and super handsome, but he's really only thinking of himself.

So what do women really want? What makes a man attractive? To find my answer I conducted a poll of not-so randomly selected females between the ages of 22 to 40. In all honesty, I just sent out a mass text to some of my girlfriends. The results were what I expected. Most of the ladies think confidence, intelligence, and a sense of humor are sexy. These responses are a no-brainer, and in fact, when I asked a guy for his opinion on the answers, he called this generic. But unlike men, we require more than looks. And to be completely honest, these basic traits we see in a sexy man are hard to come by. So difficult that one of my friends said "personality, personal style and hygiene" are sexy. HYGIENE! There must be an abundance of dirty boys out there. An interesting thing that came up in my survey were the length and detail of the responses. The girls who are a bit younger and aren't seriously dating anyone tended to have answers that were short and sweet. While the ladies who are in a long-term relationship, have children, and are married or divorced were much more particular about what makes a man sexy.

Here are a few of the notable quotables:

"Intelligence and wit. Sense of humor. Creative. Pretty eyes. Lol. And an accent helps too."
"Humor and wit. Also a guy that actually takes interest in what I do."
"Intelligence, emotional maturity, a great smile, and nice abs. Unwavering confidence, but not haughty about it."
"Physically, the smile, nice teeth, confidence, a style that works for his body, well groomed. Additionally, cool personality, caring heart, and a protector. Don't forget a hug and a kiss that will make you melt."
"Emotional intelligence, empathy, and strong arms."
"His kindness and empathy for others, desire for knowledge as well as open to new things/different people, his sincere love for God, his drive, his ability to be focused and centered on his goals without desiring to tear people down in the process of getting what he wants out of life."
"Intelligence about worldly things, having an abundant passion for what ever it is they do in life. A man who genuinely cares about others and knows what being a MAN really means. If you find one can you please let me know!!"

When I was in college, a guy with nice teeth, pretty eyes, and strong shoulders were all I needed. But now I think humility, kindness, talent, and a passion for something or so sexy. I'll still stare at the guy with a chiseled face and kissable lips, but I'll be even more attracted to the skinny guy who looks up from his computer and smiles at me.

Chime in: What makes a man sexy to you? Who is your sexiext man alive?

Keep It Scruffy

When I was a little girl and my dad or grandfather would give me a kiss on my cheek, I'd say "Ewww, you're sticky" referring to the prickly stubble on their faces. I knew then that real man-scaping was the art of shaving facial hair. Late Saturday mornings I'd watch my Pops trim his mustache with precision and carefully shave his chin. I was in awe. How did he know what would look right? Was it trial and error? What if he cut his 'stache all wrong and then have to shave it all off? I tried to imagine the hair shifting around different positions on his face wondering if dad would look crazy with a big burly beard. Now I realize that for some guys, their facial hair is what defines them. Can you imagine Lincoln without a beard or Magnum P.I. without that thick mustache. Of course not. It would have changed the course of history.

Facial hair has most definitely made a comeback in recent years. Handlebar mustaches and thick beards used to be the style in Antebellum times, but you see a lot of younger guys rocking those looks now. Have you seen the Hipster or Civil War soldier pictures? Classic. Ok, ok... all laughs aside. Dudes with notable facial hair is a thing. you can find guys with beards in campaigns and tv commercials everywhere. There are male models that are getting work solely based on this trend, and they look killer. If you see some freshly shaven boy in an ad it's one thing, but if you see that same ad featuring a guy with a Lord of the Rings beard you're going to pay more attention. Am I right?

I'm no facial hair expert, especially since I don't have any (thank God). But from a lady's perspective, I've divided a man's facial hair into three different categories:

1. The 'Stache - It can skinny like a tie or thick like an ascot. There are charts and diagrams dedicated to the different shapes of mustaches. I don't have a preference as long as it's not sleazy or the Toothbrush mustache like Charlie Chaplin. And guys, keep it trimmed. You don't want it covering your lip because then no girl will want to kiss you (unless that's what you're going for).

2. The Scruff - It's somewhere in between a five o'clock shadow and a full beard. Guys can still have a mustache and fall into the scruff category. The trick is length and density. The point is the guy doesn't want to look like he's trying too hard, but his face is still touchable. And... some guys need this little bit of scruff to define their jawlines, or else they'd just have baby faces.

3. The Super Beard - I like to describe this as biblical, apocalyptic or sexy lumberjack. This beard is the stuff of legend. Some men attempt to conquer it, but it takes a brave soul to actually pull it off. Don't let it overpower you, guys. When it starts to blend into your chest hair, we have a problem.

A dude with a defining mustache or beard is such a turn-on. Facial hair is what divides the boys from the men. Forget that peach fuzz, and give me some real scruff.

Chime in: Guys with facial hair - yay or nay?

This Is A Man's World

Nothing excites me more than a well-dressed man. He is the definition of cool. The way he carries himself. His demeanor. He knows nothing can phase him. When he is in his element, he has a power no one can touch. You long to be in his presence and you are drawn to his charm. He is a killer. Cold as ice. I am so intrigued by guys whose style is so impeccable that I'm dedicating this month to menswear.

I've always been drawn to men's fashion. As a teen, I was such a tomboy that I'd buy Brooks Brothers button-ups and Ralph Lauren sweaters instead of chick clothes. I even went as far as wearing guy's cologne. I dressed the way I wanted my boyfriend to dress. Eventually I gave him some of my stuff and started dressing more like a girl. Even now I still have this habit. This morning, I had Steve McQueen in my head, so that's how I wanted to look. I threw on my fave boyfriend jeans, boots, a tee, leather jacket, and shades and walked hard like a dude. There's a way to look feminine in masculine clothes, but sometimes I just don't give a ...

A well-dressed man isn't all suits and ties, but also about structure. The angles of a guy's face and his body intersect the lines in his jackets, shirts, and pants to create a strong image. It's that strength and power that we're all attracted to.

So for November, I'm pulling inspiration from the best in menswear from film to fashion to music. James Bond. Ozwald Boateng's A Man's Story. My own gentlemen's club photo shoot. We've got so much to look forward to. The swoon factor is about to get out of hand! "Cuz every girl's crazy 'bout a sharp dressed man."