Throwing Shade on Body Shaming

Nearly two weeks ago on #WCW or Women Crush Wednesday, I received an alert on Instagram. Someone tagged me in the comments section of a photo by up-and-coming songstress Justine Skye. She'd posted a picture of me (similar but not the one above) from the Jungle Gurl campaign I did years ago. I can't tell you word for word what Justine said, but she mentioned that she liked my body and I inspired her to workout. I was flattered. Minutes later when I decided to comment and say thanks for the love, I noticed other people's responses. While there were those comments that encouraged Justine and commended me on my physique, a lot of the other stuff I saw I didn't like. In the same breath that people were telling Justine she should be happy with her shape, they were shaming mine. Once again, this isn't verbatim, but things like She's too skinny - She ain't got no booty - She's not even in shape were in the mix. Talk about rude. Before I could take screenshot or even respond to the criticism, the photo disappeared.

Justine must have deleted it. With thousands of likes and tons of comments, I wondered why she'd gotten rid of the post. Perhaps the pressure on her was too heavy. Or what if she didn't want to deal with the naysayers. Maybe she couldn't take the heat, but I can. Justine Skye is a young, talented vocalists whose star is rising. She's just 18 years old and very impressionable. What others say about her music, her life, and what she likes probably means a lot to her. But just because she deleted the instagram photo doesn't mean the conversation is over. Hold up, let me put on my boxing gloves. It's about to get ugly.

Round 1 - If you don't have anything good to say, keep your mouth shut. Women are already self-conscious enough about our bodies. Some of us stand in the mirror and stare at our flaws. "If I could only get rid of these stretch marks." "My boobs sag." "My stomach isn't flat." We don't need you adding in your two cents too. What if we all walked around shouting out your shortcomings? Could you handle that? Ladies if you're guilty of this, I'm really disappointed in you. Did your mother not teach you any manners? It's enough that we have to deal with men verbally degrading our bodies, but we shouldn't have to fight our own sisters too.

Round 2 - Justine Skye has every right to admire someone else's body, and it does not mean that she doesn't love her own. There may be parts of her petite frame that she absolutely adores and others she wants to tone up. But that doesn't mean she's going to go under the knife to get her ideal physique. Come on! I may love J Lo's and Beyonce's booties, but who says I'm going to get a Brazilian Butt lift or injections to achieve that. Ok, I realize that some people will go to extremes, but if you notice someone you care about shifting in that direction offer encouragement. Don't knock another chick's body in your attempt to lift your friend up.

Round 3- I am a freaking human being too. Oh so because I'm a model or some person you don't know means it's ok for you to talk trash about my body. Hell no! If you want to ridicule me for my taste in music, my political views, or even the fact that I don't like ketchup, that's fine. But cutting me down because of my body, my hair texture, my race or the freckles on my face is completely unacceptable. Do you think I can help the way I look? Sure I can gain some weight, hit the gym, eat more carbs, get a fancy celebrity trainer, but I'm pretty sure that I'll still look like this. What you see is what I look like naturally. Flaws and all. I woke up like this! What gives you the right to judge me? What title do you hold that says it's ok to try and shame me? I am happy. I am healthy. I love my body. I get the feeling you can't say the same, and that's why you're trying to talk sh*t about mine.

TKO! Don't hate. Jealousy and envy will get you nowhere. You must think that the only way to bring yourself up is by cutting other people down. If that's the case, I doubt you'll ever be satisfied with that person you see in the mirror. Learn to love to yourself and accept your body. I know it's not easy, but surrounding yourself with good people and positive images will help. And for heaven's sake, keep your negativity to yourself. What goes around comes around, so say nice things about other women instead.

Sound off: Have you ever thrown shade on another woman's body to make yourself feel better?